dreamin'

and it's at times like these that i wonder why i struggle so much.
Is it because I'm not a perfect person, and i don't get everything i ever wanted.
is it because i get most of what i want, but the true things deep down that i badly want, i never get.
I only get the things i really don't need as much as I think.
I just want, what i dream of.
tis all.

bring me closer.

your grace covers me freely, arms of love wrapped around me.
I stand in awe of your beauty.
and i humble myself at your feet.

Your breath runs through my soul and it fills up every empty hole.
and i just want to be loved by you.
can't you see its what i want you to do.

let my mouth speak for you,
let my eyes see for you.
You're my everything and anything,
the most important thing.
Lord draw me closer..
I want to be closer.

when i cry out you hear me, and all of my thoughts you see.
you know when I fall out of place,
i'm needing your saving grace.

so, let my mouth speak for you,
let my eyes see for you.
You're my everything and anything,
the most important thing.
Lord draw me closer..
I want to be closer.

all i want is to be closer to you...



AND another song i've written.
with no title yet.

There is sunshine over those hills
and everything in life stands still.
sunrises, and sunsets
i'll live my life with no regrets.

so as the sun dances on those hills
my heart stands still.
i've got the chills - early morning daze,
it's all apart of the life you gave.

ever wonder what its like to be perfect,
to feel like your worth it?
I often wonder what i can do to be sinless,
perhaps to live without life's stress.
i'm not the only one falling short, and i know..
woahhh.

Cause' i've fallen out of place
and i need your saving grace.
so can you save me, i need you to save me.
Cause' when i'm falling apart, bring me back to the start.
oh lord i need you in my heart.
please just save me.

ever wonder what its like to be perfect,
to feel like your worth it?
I often wonder what i can do to be sinless,
perhaps to live without life's stress.
i'm not the only one falling short, and i know..
woahhh.

Cause' i've fallen out of place
and i need your saving grace.
so can you save me, i need you to save me.
Cause' when i'm falling apart, bring me back to the start.
oh lord i need you in my heart.
please just save me.





voila. even though. I think I'm terrible at writing songs, and I haven't even gotten a beat or anything set to them cuz I can't play any instruments so it kinda sucks haha.

i can only imagine.

Do you know what it feels like to go through the thought process that maybe you best friends had just died. I had one of the scariest nights the other night. I was texting a friend and it must've been around 1 in the morning, and they were driving home another friend too. Out of no where in the middle of a text they stopped texting me. I got so worried. I thought maybe I had created an accident. Maybe my texting them, and having them text me back had killed them. I got so worried, i texted them like 5 times asking if they were alright and to text me back soon if they were. I thought maybe I had just lost two of my good friends. I was worried til near 3 in the morning where I finally fell asleep. At 4 in the morning, my cell phone started ringing, immediately I woke up and looked and it was the person who had suddenly stopped texitng me. I picked it up, and all I heard was nothing, no sounds, no background noise. Nothing. So I got scared even more, and kinda just let it be and went back to bed. In the morning I woke up to a text saying that the person had fallen asleep while texting me and their phone was left open. During the middle of the morning they must've accidently pressed something on their phone while asleep that made their phone call me.

It's just a realization that I'm not quite sure what I would do without those two people in my life. It makes me also realize what I would do if I didn't have all the people in my life I have now. Because at one point I didn't, and that was hell. I can imagine what life would be like without those people, and I don't want that. I want those people in my life, and if I have to fight like hell to keep some of them, I will.